Sadly, I guess, Minneapolis Star Tribune opinion writer Katherine Kersten is the worst. This piece isn’t a useful outlay of facts but instead a splatter of unsolicited personal bias. It’s also really jumpy, so I decided to flow it out for you below.
In Kersten-land, everyone will end up harmed if gays get to marry. Here’s the deal (her ordering):
1. (Assumed.) People want to have sex; marriage is a thing.
2. Marriage channels sex-drive into “productive ends” (babies).
3. Then mothers “harness” man sex-drive.
4. Ergo, marriage is and must be about babies.
5. Gay marriage, on the other hand, is about adults.
6. Which results in the invalidation of even more of my assumptions. (Like about your spouse and family.)
7. But like I was saying, not all kids live with a mom and a dad and the gays will make that even worse! Talk about societal erosion!
8. Plus gays only marry when they want to- not when they feel pressured to.
9. And that will transfer to straights as soon as the gays marry and then people will start to do even more things simply because they “want to” or “don’t want to.”
10. So marriage will become an option, not requirement or pressure for bunches of people.
11. And then in a few seconds or whatever people will be all, “I live with my sister, so I should get a marriage to her.”
12. And that’s because, clearly, sex is going to stop being a part of marriage as per its definition (because each time I think about gay sex I throw up a bit so I decided I had to stop believing it was real and then #11 popped into my head).
13. Plus, we all know “nature” is a thing. I mean, except for climate change of course, but the dumbo-heads who believe in that are pretty much the ones who want the gays to marry in the first place. They don’t want to change anything but then they want to change everything! HOW IRONIC.
14. Marriage is so amazing; who can even know it?
All-in-all, quite strong arguments. These things are all so… slippery and sloppy. I mean, sloped. A slippery slope.
